Tuesday, December 07, 2010

George Lucas needs to be stopped!

The Daily Mail recently interviewed writer and director Mel Smith whose unhappy collaboration with the Flanneled One (George Lucas) on 1994's Radioland Murders (a film I actually kind of appreciate) is obviously still fresh in his mind, calling the film a "disaster" and laying much of the blame on Lucas's inability to understand comedy. Smith also derides Lucas' obsession with CGI and then goes on to say (cue the horror music):

"Lucas has been buying up the film rights to dead movie stars in the hope of in the hope of using computer trickery to put the all together in a movie, so you'd have Orson Welles and Barbara Stanwyck appearing alongside today's stars."

If even an iota of this is true (there have been no announcements of such a project from the Lucas empire) then the time has finally come for film lovers to take back what is theirs, to mobilize the masses and storm the Skywalker ranch with pitchforks and torches. A line needs to be drawn in the sand. It is one thing to make new CGI-driven drivel but to desecrate the memory of beloved stars the and the wonderful films they starred in is quite another. Some years back film aficionados decried the horrible attempts of media mogul Ted Turner to colorize classic films, most notoriously Casablanca, and the travesty was put to an end by a collective outcry of shock and dismay. What Turner did, and what Lucas may intend to do, is nothing short of cultural desecration, a tasteless, immoral attempt to profit of the memory of great artists whose legacy would be forever tarnished by Lucas' computerized side-show.

So keep on your toes, folks. Hoard some gasoline and get those pitchforks and can openers ready. When the call comes to take on the evil empire of Lucas we must rally the forces of good.


Reido Bandito said...

great, now there's vomit all over my computer

Steinar Ingi said...

Time for another South Park episode.